Apathetic GoTB

I have recently been bad about posting. It seems I have been taken over by two (not unfamiliar) monsters; apathy and depression. Depression is something I have struggled with for a long time. And typically I do just that; I struggle. I kick and scream and cry and rage against this force. I battle it with meditation, phone calls, friends, family, art, music, love, coffee, sunshine, exercise, tea, Buddhism, and a plethora of other things too numerous to count. I struggle to find some ray of hope and sunshine to cling to. Most times I find success just in the struggle itself. I may be depressed, but at least I am fighting.

Other times, Depression's blank friend Apathy decides to join, and that is when things become... less hopeful. Typically it goes like this. Depression ----> notice depression ----> meditate (paint, read ect) ----> feel a little better ----> repeat. However, once Apathy joins the party a whole other cycle starts. Depression ----> notice depression ----> don't care ----> more depression ----> don't care ----> ∞. That's the dangerous thing about it; not caring about not caring. And nothing gets done. My experience is in no way unique. Of all the research I have read about depression, apathy is common in many cases. So how do we pull ourselves out of that? Do we rely on other's to make us feel better? Soldier on and try to push through it? What do you do to motivate yourself?

Listing GotB

I found inspiration in one of my favorite blogs the other day. Elise over at A Beautiful Mess posted about a list she makes every year of things she wants to accomplish. Sounds pretty ordinary. I mean, I think everyone has to do lists and bigger life goals lists ect. But I liked this one because it starts on your birthday and you make a new one every year. It's a great way to inspire yourself and I love that you can look back through the years and see how much your needs and wants have changed. I'm making my own 24 Before 25 list and it's going to be awesome. Of course, I am usually a little too optimistic when I make lists like these and add too many big projects. However, no one ever said you had to accomplish everything on the list! And roll over is totally allowed. Let me know if you make a list and feel like sharing.

Imperfect GotB

Wabi-sabi. It's my new favorite word (and it's so fun to say). It is something I have loved for quite a long time, I just didn't know what to call it. Wabi-sabi is finding beauty in things that are imperfect or incomplete. Friends usually scratch their heads when I am taking pictures of dilapidated buildings and rotting fruits, but these are the things I find most interesting. Perfection is something so many strive for, yet perfection is not attainable. I find "perfect", "whole" things boring. I would rather capture something real. Something that has seen some history, faced some trials. And aren't the people that we admire most the people that freely admit they are not perfect? The people that have faced the most hardships? Hardships leave scars. They leave a mark on us so we always remember what we have come from and how we are better for having gotten through it. Wabi-sabi people in a wabi-sabi world.

Donating GotB

Godspeed my good friend.

So after all the posts I have written about changing peoples' lives, I realized I haven't done much to try and change the world. Sure I have sung a lot. Even at Carnegie Hall and Lincoln Center. And while it is a unyielding belief of mine that music changes the world, I get just as much out of it as the person listening. I sing because I love it. So yesterday I "donated" something that for the past year has been very dear to me: my poetry journal. I was switching journals, and instead of throwing the journal away or tearing the pages out for a later use, I decided to brighten someone's day with it. I love things like Found Magazine (link) and often dreamed of finding a treasure left behind by someone; something that would give me a clue as to what their life was like. I also dreamed of leaving behind a piece of myself somewhere for someone else to find. It's kind of like the butterfly effect. So that's what I did. I hope that my journal finds someone who needed cheering. And I included a bookmark and note that asked them to add some poems and one day pass it on to someone else. If you feel like changing someone's day for the better, let me know know how you did i, and I'll post. We're all in this world together, might as well make it as wonderful as possible.

Inspired GotB

A few quotes caught my eye the other day:

Every new day is another chance to change your life - anon

He is able who thinks he is able - Buddha

No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again - Buddha

I found a tremendous amount of wisdom and solace in these few sentences. Times are hard for most people today, particularly in this economy. And sometimes that can lead to a feeling of hopelessness. I know I experience that feeling often. I think that we often forget that each day is an opportunity and is precious. We DO have the power to actually change things in our lives; we have the power to change other's lives. Today I started trying to change little things in myself for the better. I forgot that it was my job to do this and I have missed so many chances to change simply because I felt I was at the whim of circumstances. Do you forget that you have the power to change things? Do you forget that new beginnings can start anytime? I hope these quotes inspired you. Let me know what you think.

Thoughtful GotB

"Who Killed John Key" -- Sam Mahons

Using Stumble Upon (one of my favorite sites), I found an article about Sam Mahons "Who Killed John Key?" He was asked if he was afraid people would be offended by the image. He responded "All art is expression and metaphor and the job artists have is to make people feel uncomfortable. Now once you've made people uncomfortable you've got their attention. And once you've got their attention you can begin to change their mind." Which made me question what I think my job is as an artist. While I agree that art should make people think and question their beliefs or the current social/political ect system, I never considered my job as an artist (or musician for that fact) one to make people uncomfortable. And I have heard these kind of comments from artists of all kinds. I even read a magazine article last holiday season in which a woman claimed gifts should be something that takes a person out of their comfort zone.

I always viewed my job as one of uplifting society; inspiring "ordinary people" or "the average Joe". I think the world is full of uncomfortable people, what the world needs is more people who are inspired and fulfilled. Don't get me wrong, I love artists, musician, architects, and any creative people that strive to wake people up or change their perspective. And we need these people. But I find this idea of "uncomfortable to change people's minds" can be taken too far; I find artists that rely purely on shock value to be tiresome and pretentious. 

Journalin' GotB

When I was younger I decided to start a journal which I filled with photos of friends, poetry, and pre-pubescent angst. Now twelve years later I still keep a journal, but instead of filling it with all my angsty ramblings, I fill it with art and inspiration. The art helps me look back through the journal and remember my life as beautiful. And it helps me see that I am always growing as a person, artist, and musician. It's my art journal. I thought I would share some pics, and I hope to inspire someone to keep their own art journal; whether you fill it with pictures, poetry, doodles, paintings, quotes, scrap book elements, ticket stubs, or some smears of coffee grounds from breakfast. Times become hard and you fall down. I empathize with this presently. It helps to look back on better days. And know better days are still coming.

A one page spread. I usually cut them in half.

Workin GotB

Follow

An early update as I will be busy tomorrow morning. I've been trying to put together a photography set. So I've been editing pictures and trying to add pictures that flow well with each other. It's turning out to be harder than I thought because I am tying together modern hotels, a crumbling penitentiary, and ruins in Switzerland. I'm not sure when I will finish the set, but I thought it would be nice to show a preview. The one above is from a trip I took to Switzerland some years back. Let me know what you think.

New GotB

(We Could All Use a Little)

It's funny how often I find myself putting things off because I am waiting for the perfect time. We invent so many excuses to put off the things we really want or need. I am again the new girl, having recently moved. I moved for several reasons; two big reasons were to pursue a musical and artistic career. Maybe start putting some paintings up in local shops, teach voice lessons. But I always have excuses not to start these projects. I didn't even want to start my blog until it was perfect; the background was perfect, I learned more HTML, ect. However, is life ever "perfect"? Should we just stand around waiting for the right time to pursue our dreams or start on our projects? Maybe the right time doesn't simply "come". Maybe we need to take a leap, make it happen, and hope it will work itself out. I'm going to be editing photos until I have a set I want to display. What projects have you been putting off?

Some good artist inspiration